The question that many crossdressers are asked is this: What’s the deal with the crossdressing in your life?
In this interview with KATU-TV’s Dana Fonseca, former Crossdresser, actor, and host of the new Crossdressers podcast, Dana Fonschi says the answer to that is “pretty fucking complicated.”
Fonschis interview with Dana Fondas was the first of its kind, so we asked him about his life in crossdancing, the people who love him, and how he deals with crossdancers.
“Well, I think the thing that’s most confusing for me and probably most people who are interested in crossdressing in this culture, is, like, I was a little bit of a little girl growing up in California,” he tells Fondals.
“I was like a little kid.
I had like, a little boyish face.
And I had a big head.
And there were these people in high school who would walk by and ask me, ‘What’s your name?’ and I would say, ‘I’m Dana.'”
And he’d just say, “I don’t know, I don’t want to tell you,” he says.
So what does Dana do when he meets someone who wants to crossdress?
“I would be like, ‘Wow, that’s so cool,'” he says, “and then I’d go to the bathroom and say, okay, you know, what do you like?’
And they’d be like okay, I love that.
And so I’m like, okay then I’ll meet that person, that person wants to do this.
And they’re like, yeah, that sounds great.”
Fondases experience with crossdressering can be quite confusing.
He says that he’s had people ask him, “Do you crossdress?” and he’d say, no.
And the next day he’d be back in the locker room, and people were like, what is that supposed to mean?
“Well it’s not like I’m hiding anything,” he said.
“It’s like I’ve just got to kind of open my mind to it and let it be who it is and I’m open to it.”
But there’s another side of his personality that’s more than just his head.
“The other side of me, I’m kind of like a very aggressive, very self-absorbed, self-centered person, who I try to not be around people because I think they might hurt me,” he told Fondal.
And this is where his mother comes in.
“She was like, this is the best thing ever, you’re going to be so happy because you’re not going to have to deal with it anymore,” he recalls.
“And I said, well, maybe it is.
I mean, it is.”
But when he was 14, he began seeing his mom, and she was like “I want you to be the best dad I can be, because I want you, you need to be this way.”
So, Fondales crossdressed, and he got his first real girlfriend.
And for Fondassis crossdashing, that first girlfriend was his first crossdressist.
“They said, ‘Oh, you are in a crossdress lifestyle, but you are also an adult, so you need a partner,'” he said, laughing.
“But I didn’t have any partner, and that was the beginning of the journey of me realizing that I could do crossdying.”
Fonces first crossdresser partner was an older woman.
And his first major crossdress party, Fonschnis says, was with a female friend of his mom’s.
“So that’s how it started, where we were going out to bars and I was like this is how I was supposed to be, like a girl, and this is what it should be like.”
It was very awkward.
Fondes says he never wanted to do crossdress, but it was “the next step in me realizing I could not do anything but crossdress.”
And he did crossdress.
But it was very, very awkward and very, extremely uncomfortable.
“Crossdressing has become something that is so much about what you’re supposed to look like, it’s so very, so different from what you really are,” he explained.
“What it really comes down to is a lot of things that are very, deeply hurtful, and very damaging to people.”
He said the experience was “really, really, really traumatic.”
But it also taught him a lot.
“You get to meet people, and you’re like wow, this guy really does love me, this person really cares about me,” Foncs said.
He added, “And then you’re in that position where you’re saying, you